Seattle and Portland: A Whole New World

It's 2am, but my body is till telling me that it's 11pm. That 3 hour time change has my internal clock all in a tizzy! Anyway, I couldn't go to bed before pouring my heart out into this post, especially since I haven't posted in an immensely, unacceptably long amount of time. So many problems...

As many of you know, this past week I took my first ever commercial flight to the West Coast! I visited Portland, OR on Wednesday and Seattle, WA on Thursday and Friday. New experiences abound! I've never been anywhere west of Chicago before (save for that AMAZING experience in South Dakota during spring break last year), so this was all new to me. Where do I even begin?

I suppose we will begin where all good stories start: at the beginning! The airport. 5:30am. Dark outside. Cold as all Polar Vortexes. In short, not a fun morning. Our plane left the Lansing airport at 7:15am, and I would like to think that I conducted myself pretty professionally on my first flight ever. On the inside, I kept panicking that security was going to stop me, pat me down, send their hounds on me and throw me in the jail where they send all irresponsible flight passengers, but thankfully that never happened! Security was a bit of a bitch though, pardoning my language. I mean, what do you people think I'm going to bring on this plane? Dynamite? Nun-chucks? Secret ninja tools? Or maybe something from my vast guns and knife collection? Because those are all of the things that security specified NOT to bring when I checked their website...

Regardless, I got on the plane without a hitch and for the next 7 and a half hours, was on my way to an experience I am so grateful that I had.

We landed in Portland at 11:30am (which was really 2:30pm Eastern Time because of the time change) and headed off to our hotel. Can I just say how absolutely spoiled rotten I felt at that hotel? First off all, it was super classy: white sheets and all. Second, I got my OWN ROOM. That's right: 2 beds, a full bathroom, and a television ALL TO MYSELF. I guess since I was traveling with the University, they can't make me room with someone else for privacy reasons or something. Whatever, I'm not complaining :)

Food Trucks in Portland

After checking into the hotel, Drew (the other student I was traveling with) and I went out to explore the city. First, we ate at the food trucks pictured on the right. Food trucks are apparently a big thing on the West Coast. I had some authentic Iraqi cuisine, while Drew had Korean. I must say, some of the best Middle Eastern food I've ever tasted, and made by immigrants who had tasted the real stuff. Fabulous. When we finished eating, Drew and I were going to go to the park, when it started to pour. And I mean pour. We ran into a coffee shop to get out of the rain and were so wet that the waitress offered us towels to dry ourselves off! Good ol' Portland for ya! Eventually, the rain subsided, and we headed off to the Chinese Gardens.

Family room entrance sign

Stone waterfall

The Chinese Gardens: a magical, otherworldly oasis situated right in the middle of the city. As you can see in the pictures, the gardens included a small pond surrounded by buildings that resembled those owned by wealthy families in sixteenth century China. There was a study room, gazebo, family room, tea shop in the back, and many, many freshly-blooming flowers and trees. The sights, sounds, and smells of the garden were designed by the architects to send you back to this time in Chinese history and give you a small taste of what life was like. The carvings in the pictured stone wall and over the door frames symbolize peace and good spirits to all who enter the home, and they ward off bad spirits that may try to defile this tranquil space. It was such a lovely scene, and made me wish that Michigan was no longer immersed in this eternal winter. Only 2 more months till spring...

Me at the Chinese Gardens

Wednesday night, I presented alongside Drew and my boss at an alumni event at the Portland Art Museum. This was the reason that I went on this trip in the first place. I spoke about the Creativity Exploratory (CE) at the College of Arts and Letters (website can be found here), which has been my workplace since last spring semester. I updated the alumni on events going on within MSU and informed them of why the CE is a place that matters to me and that I invest my time in. I was extremely nervous to speak in front of such a large group of people, but once I got up there, I just did it. I pretended I was an actress hired to sell the space, and I acted. Can't really remember what I said, but apparently I did a good job, because after I finished several alumni came up to me and told me that they loved my speech. They said I was on the right track to success, which of course was encouraging to hear. One of them even gave me his business card and told me to email him if I was ever looking for an internship (which I always am). I was over. The. MOON. Absolutely fantastic day. And the trip only got better from there.

Magazines from the 30's

Thursday morning we flew from Portland to Seattle, and arrived at our hotel on the waterfront of Puget Sound around 11:30am. Once more, I got my own room and enjoyed it immensely. After arriving at the hotel, Scott (my boss), Drew, and I immediately walked to the Pike Place Market, a must-see for all in Seattle. We saw the famous gum wall. We watched the famous fish men do their routine in the market. We visited the original Starbucks (not really anything that special). We did it all.

Home-grown veggies

The market was my favorite part of our Seattle adventures, by far: a bustling, eclectic torrent of tourists, street performers, immigrants and workers of all cultures, races, and backgrounds. Homemade goods overwhelmed my senses: teas, fruits (the Washington-grown pears being my favorite), vegetables, old Time magazines and newspaper clippings, leather journals, candles, lotions, herbal remedies, honey, fish, shrimp, crab, and other seafood caught in the ocean not far off. Basically, anything and everything that you could imagine ever wanting ever was in that market. They even had wallets made from recycled tires! Talk about a progressive city!

Fish at the market

By the time Drew and I left the market (our boss had wandered off), we had enough time to eat some ice cream and walk through the park, viewing the mountains in the distance, before we had to get ready for our final performance. This time, we spoke to Seattle-based MSU alums at the Seattle Asian Art Museum. Same routine, same fantastic results. Some alumni came up and spoke to me afterwards about what a great job I did, and two people this time gave me their cards and told me to email them about an internship over the summer. One girl who I particularly liked even offered to house me at her place for the summer! I must say, they were all very accommodating and overly kind to me, Becky Harris of Lapeer.

Becky Harris who had never ridden on a commercial airplane before. Becky Harris, who had never been anywhere west of Chicago. Becky Harris, who is unimaginably thankful and blessed to have had this opportunity, and who will never be able to thank her work enough for taking her.

All I have left to say is thank you. Thank you to everyone who helped make this trip a reality. Thank you to God for allowing me to live such an amazing life. And thank you to all of you, for reading this obnoxiously long post.

The Battle Against Laziness

For the first time in a loooong time, my university has a snow day tomorrow! Hurray! It is days like these that make me realize how much I love living in Michigan, with our unpredictable snow and ice storms. Some people might hate them, but I am currently very grateful to have 12"+ of snow :)

Since I don't have school tomorrow, I really have no excuse not to write a blog post, especially since I haven't written one in...a while. It's not even like I was too busy and I didn't have time. It's more like, I'm a lazy fool who loves sitting around watching TV instead of doing the things I should be doing. Like, you know, writing blog posts. BUT I HAVE CHANGED! I have renounced my old ways of procrastination and laziness! I have taken up arms for the battle against sloth and gluttony!

Can you tell that I am also a little bit bored? I get dramatic when I am bored. Please forgive me: my imaginary scenarios make my life more interesting.

What am I going on about, you ask? Where am I going with this? I honestly just started writing this post in hopes that something would come to me...and something did! So here we go! The topic of today's post will be...laziness, and my never-ending battle against it.

It is a battle, believe me. This part I am not dramatizing. If I could do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, well then I would honestly do absolutely nothing all of the time. I love being lazy: sitting around watching TV and eating. Doesn't everyone? That's sort of why Netflix and Nutella are so popular...But this troubles me, and it is one of my least favorite traits about myself. I try my best to overpower it, but sometimes it is a struggle. It is only after periods of long vacation and relaxation that I find my laziness resurfacing and taking hold, kind of like a constricting snake, wrapping itself around me until I feel practically numb to everything else. Getting back in the grove of being motivated and doing things is difficult, but once I get started, I find that things get a little easier as I go. It all starts with getting up in the morning, at a reasonable time.

This topic came to mind because I am feeling particularly lazy right now, and it troubles me. So, to negate the laziness and begin shrugging off my winter break skin, I decided to write this post. Then I am going to go for a run tomorrow, and maybe have dinner with a friend. Baby steps, and before I know it, I'll be back in the groove of things.

People, myself included, often wonder why I keep myself so busy all of the time. At first, I myself didn't even know. But as I continue to grow and deepen my understanding of myself and why I do the things I do, I've figured it out. The main, but not the only reason that I keep myself so busy is because that is the only way I can keep myself moving along like a well-oiled machine. That is the only way I can get the motivation up to a high level and keep it there, so that I do not get choked by the constricting force of my natural laziness.

The more I do, the better I feel, and the better I feel, the more motivated I am to do even more. It is a semi-vicious cycle, but I'm figuring out how to handle it. And it has it's drawbacks: I find myself feeling guilty for having fun sometimes, because it feels like I shouldn't be wasting my motivation on such trivial things. I've discovered very recently that, in reality, being lazy is not always a bad thing. It is ok, even recommendable, to relax and unwind sometimes. I have learned that I just have to be cautious about when I relax, and for how long. If I'm not careful, I could spiral downwards into my unmotivated pit, and it will take even longer to climb myself out again.

This post turned out to be just as much about motivation as it is about laziness, I suppose. Sorry about that: sometimes my brain just does what it wants without me asking first. I just do the writing.

I guess one message you could take from this post would be to stay motivated. Not everyone suffers from my chronic laziness, but I know a lot of people do. What I'd recommend to cure the lazy-bones would be to simply start small. Make yourself get up no later than 9am. You'd be surprised the amount of things you can get accomplished before noon. Once you're up, maybe do a quick exercise routine: it will get you motivated to do things for the rest of the day. Once you think you're ready, text one of your friends, maybe somebody you haven't seen in a while, and set up plans for sometime in the week. I have noticed that if you make plans with someone else for the week, it's harder to back down. So you HAVE to do things! It's a great way to back yourself into a corner of motivation, really.

Maybe for this New Years, my resolution will be to stay motivated! And for all of you out there who are like me, good luck getting through the winter blues and staying perky as a peach! Best Wishes, Friends.

"Girl Rising": Born into Privilege

Such inspiration has struck me tonight! It seems like every time I go to an Alternative Spartan Breaks meeting or event, I leave feeling like I am going to CHANGE THE WORLD. Which, well, I am: one issue at a time.

At the meeting tonight we watched a documentary called "Girl Rising" about a few extraordinary girls worldwide who were changing the status quo and taking control of their lives by enrolling in school. The documentary gave some astounding statistics about female education rates throughout the world, and the rate of girls who had no education and had AIDS, died from child birth, or were married off young compared to girls who had the privilege of receiving an education. The facts that were presented were ASTOUNDING, and really made me take a step back and evaluate my own life in comparison to these girls (who were, by the way, usually around 8-13 years old).

I was born into a white, middle-class family in a fairly-stable town in the United States. How much better off can I get? And one thing I realized while watching this video, was that I was really just born lucky. There is no particular reason that I was born to the family I have rather than a poor family in Afghanistan or India who is struggling to survive. Why do I have the things I have? Simply because I was born into the right family, in the right place, at the right time. Now that is something hard to swallow. If you really think about it, this is the case for most of us: we were born privileged. And, sadly, millions, even billions of children around the world are not born privileged like we are. They have to struggle and fight, and often die for the simplest of pleasures: clean water, food, shelter, and an education.

Another thing this documentary really made me analyze was the things I complain about on a day-to-day basis. "I don't know what to do with my life: should I be a writer or a marketer? An engineer or a scientist? A doctor or a social worker?" Take a step back. Think about this. No matter what you do, you will most likely still end up with a job, and an education in something. The question for me and my situation is, what will make me happy? The question for girls across the country is, what will help me survive? What will keep me safe from rape? What will prevent me from having to get married and have children at age 11 (an age where I was still playing with Barbie dolls)?

Lastly, I've realized something. It means a lot to me to go out and find these girls (and boys) with these stories, and to help people who were not born into privilege like I was. It means the world to me to make a difference in the lives of others while I am here, so that when I am gone, it won't matter where someone is born or the color of their skin, or their sex, because everywhere in the world, children will be SURROUNDED by opportunity. People will be surrounded by opportunity. People can be the heroes we read about and idolize from comic books, but we have to get started now if we are going to get anywhere.

There you have it, my inspirational and somewhat-crazy thought of the hour. I'm not going to drop everything I have to take the next ship to Cambodia (if anything, I'm going to continue my education so that I have the resources to help these people, and I act as an example for them), but I am going to seriously evaluate my life choices as I make them. I urge you to do the same. Next time you go to the cafeteria or the grocery store and grow angry when you realize that they don't have your favorite dish, think about those people who would kill for just one bite of your hamburger. Next time you feel down on yourself or sad because you don't have a boyfriend, think of all of those girls who are married at age 11 and have no choice as to who they are going to spend the rest of their life with. Next time you get tired of doing your homework and decide that watching Netflix is more important, think of those girls whose parents can't afford to send them to school and instead send them to work. Reevaluate what really matters: I know I did.

Home

Have you ever travelled back to a place that you went to in your childhood, and had this somewhat heavy feeling of nostalgia hit you right in the chest? Or have you ever seen something that reminded you of distant memories and smiled complacently to yourself?

I was just thinking about the fact that I am going home this upcoming Friday for the Hallmark Christmas Sale (no joke), and how recently, when I go home, this feeling hits me. My hometown is starting to not feel like my everyday place of life anymore: it is beginning to feel like a town filled with my memories. I guess what I mean is, it is still my home and always will be, but in a way, it is not my home anymore. Does that make sense?

It certainly is strange to go back to the place where I spent 18 years of my life not thinking I was ever going to feel like a stranger there. "Stranger" isn't the right word...I think a better term would be "visitor". I am a visitor in my own home. When I drive around the local Meijer's and clothing stores and when I wander downtown, everything feels...different. It feels like I am looking at everything from an outside perspective, rather than the insider's perspective that I had when I lived there. I'm not sure how I feel about this; what does it mean? And if I can't call the place of my birth my "home" anymore, where is my home?

Can I have multiple homes? What is it like for older people who move away from their homes and make new homes for themselves? I would imagine that a part of them always stays in their hometown, but doesn't it make people nervous to move away and start your life completely on your own? I'm not sure that I'm ready for this level of independence, though I keep telling myself that I am. A part of me wishes I could just live at home forever, but obviously this is not a legitimate idea.

So what is it like, to move away and start a life for yourself? And what do you think of as your "true home"?

Why You Are Awesome

"When you try your best, but you don't succeed. When you get what you want, but not what you need. When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep. Stuck in reverse."

"If you never try you'll never know, just what you're worth."

When I was listening to this song ("Fix You" by my favorite band Coldplay) a thought kept running through my head. Often times, I feel like I don't have control over anything: like I am just a part of the dreaded "system." I go through every day like a zombie, doing things because it's just how life is here in the USA. Class. Work. Homework. Sleep. Then wake up and do it all over again. And then I realize that the more I do this, the less and less I feel like I am actually living. And I go to bed wondering, what did I miss today that I should've taken advantage of?

It's actually quite sad to live life this way: like you're "stuck in reverse"...going through the motions...feeling tired, but not because you have done so much to actually make your body tired. You're tired because you haven't done enough.

Potential. There is always so much potential that I feel like I can't reach. I've mentioned this multiple times before: this thought that I am meant for so, so much more than what I am currently doing. I feel like I have mounds of untapped potential, like I can do almost anything, but for some reason, I'm doing very little.

Is it wrong to think this way? Am I just expecting more out of life than I should be? Maybe it is a result of my difficulty with being realistic about my current condition. I don't have a ton of money right now, so of course I'm not going to be traveling the world and going on a bunch of big huge adventures. And it's impossible to meet everyone in the world and make them all my friends. Still...still, there has to be more than what I am experiencing day after day. I've got so many ideas, so many thoughts that flicker in and out of my head day by day that go unrecognized by the public. Then again, this doesn't make me an individual: everyone has brilliant ideas! I think I just tend to notice mine more than the average person.

So, where does this leave me? Feeling boring, unfulfilled, and sad about everything? Nope. Not at all.

I don't believe in going through life thinking that we can't change anything, and that "things are the way they are." Of course things can change! And it doesn't take an army to change them. Think about it, how did things get to the way they are now? Because of innovative, individual thinkers who felt exactly the way I do now, but decided to act on it.

The first step is to understand what Coldplay was saying with the line: "If you never try, you'll never know what you're worth." If you never try, you won't ever know. You have to get up off of your butt and stop complaining, and go out there and show everyone what an awesome person you are. Show people why they should like you, and why you matter. Be the change that you wish to see in the world.

The second step is to understand personally why you are awesome. Let's face it, it will be difficult for you to make any friends or any changes if you don't understand yourself first. To be honest, I find this a difficult step. But I've managed to find things about myself that I love, and so can you! Think: what makes you love yourself? What makes you get up day after day? What makes you smile about the way you are?

Third and final step: GO! Go out and implement the changes that you wish to see. Show people your ideas. Prove to people why you deserve to be recognized. And remember, not everyone is going to listen, or care. Most people don't give a damn. But in the rare cases where we make our best friends, it's because they did care, and they saw what you saw. "If you never try you'll never know, just what you're worth."

"Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you." <3 Better yet, try to fix yourself.

Happy Wanderings

Procrastination Nation

 

You know what I've been noticing lately? People are lazy.

I am sitting at my work, doing some things on the computer, and then I realize that I ran out of things to do a little bit early. So, not wanting to sit around and do nothing while on the clock, I decided to clean my work station. I've always been like this: I feel guilty when I don't do anything and yet I am being paid to work. I thought this was a common part of being a human.

I guess I was wrong, because when I look around at the other students I am working with, half of the time they don't even seen to be doing anything productive...but here's the kicker: they don't even CARE. It's like, they are being paid to work, but they are only working half the time...

Of course, nobody can be "on" all of the time. It's just that, not even caring when you are working whether or not you are doing a good job boggles my mind. How can some people be so irresponsible, apathetic, and underachieving? Am I wrong?

Life Lessons: "Jane"

I would like to dedicate this post to someone very special to me, who has taught me more about life and the power of one person than I could ever learn from anyone else. To protect her privacy, I am going to refer to this person as "Jane".

I met Jane last year, and the first thing that I perceived about her was her openness and acceptance of complete strangers. I had originally thought of this as just a trait: she was an outgoing person. What I didn't understand at the time was the fact that this acceptance and open heart and mind did not come from her being a naturally open person: it came from her attitude to make the best out of her life, even when she had been at her worst. Her love and compassion for everyone came from her own struggles as a child, growing up with a life that would make the majority of us break down, rather than rise to the challenge.

Jane grew up in Detroit, a place where homelessness and drug addiction is not a rare sight. I am certainly not suggesting that all of Detroit is like this, but those of us who are from Michigan know that certain parts are. Jane's mother struggled to raise her on her own, yet when I ask her about her mom, Jane has nothing but positive things to say. "Yeah, she had problems, but I was always her number one priority." Jane's mother made sure that Jane always had opportunities for a good education, and stressed more than anything else the importance of Jane doing well in school. Jane said that her mom wanted so much more for Jane to go on and enjoy the life that her mother could not have, and she so badly wanted Jane to rise above their situation that she did everything she could to allow Jane to go to school and thrive there.

Jane's mother passed away when Jane was fifteen years old from a drug overdose. I remember the first time I heard this from Jane, I wasn't sure what to say. But the thing about Jane is, that she never says these things to receive pity or complain about her life to other people. Jane legitimately wants to help other people that are in similar situations to those that she had to go through. She wants her life to be an example to other people, to say "we all go through rough times, but you can rise above your struggles and go on to make a positive difference in the world. You can do something with your life. You are more than your past, and you have a future."

Almost completely on her own, Jane has managed to get accepted at Michigan State University, pay for her schooling and living expenses, and receive high marks in school. She works almost every day of the week at a job that she doesn't enjoy, and she does it with a smile and a positive attitude towards her coworkers. Jane has no addictions and does not wallow in the tragedy of her past. Instead of looking at her past with spite, she looks at it as something that she wants to learn from. And she constantly reminds me, she would not be the kind, caring, considerate, and selfless person that she is today without her wonderful mother.

I am truly amazed every time I think of Jane's story. How many of us would be able to go through life with very little instruction and be as successful as Jane is? How many of us could rise above a childhood of homelessness and want, and become a person who truly cares from the bottom of their heart for those that paid them so little attention before? I think that is my favorite thing about Jane: how much she really cares.

I have seen Jane take care of so many people this past year: friends and strangers alike. She has supported her friends through difficult life situations, and stayed up all night with them helping them sort things out, and bought them chocolate to improve their mood, and written them nice messages on the white boards on their doors, just because she wants to see them happy. I know more than a few times I have come home to a message on my white board telling me I am pretty, or funny, or I smell good (she has a pretty goofy sense of humor, like me). But the thing is, so often Jane's efforts go overlooked. People take advantage of her kindness. They think (like I used to) "oh, that's just a part of her personality". But Jane works at hr kindness, and everything she does for her loved ones is deliberate. She buys you that chocolate because she cares about you, not just because she thinks it will make her look good. The same goes for the messages, and the friend counseling.

So, I would like to take this opportunity to thank you, Jane, from the bottom of my heart, for all of the things you do that you don't have to. Thank you for going out with me when everyone else wanted to stay home, even though you didn't know where we were going. Thank you for writing funny messages on the white board so I can laugh when I get home about how strange we are. Thank you for telling me that you are proud of me and everything I have done, because you know how good the recognition feels. Thank you for being my friend, when I didn't have many, and for loving me the way that everyone deserves to be loved.

Now I have something to say to you, Jane. You deserve to have people write you nice board messages. You deserve to have people stay up all night and talk to you when you are sad. You deserve to have people tell you they are proud of you. So I will tell you right now: I am proud of you. I do appreciate the things you do for me, and I notice them. And I really do care about you. I'm only sorry more people don't say these things to you, because I know they are thinking it.

"You is kind.
You is smart.
You is important."
-The Help

I think we can all learn a lesson from Jane about how to be selfless, and how to make a positive outcome from a negative situation. So let's go out today and tell the people we care about why we love them, and let's make sure everyone feels appreciated the way they deserve to be. In conclusion, "life is full of situations where you are going to have to deal with things you don't understand, but for God's sake, be open to learn." And, be open to appreciate :)

Have a lovely weekend!